Humble Suggestions in Customer Service
Do not hire Wanda Sykes to tell me over the phone that the shipping on my $149 bookcase is $167.
In the restaurant industry, it is advisable not to drown oneself in the scent of dead flowers so much as to make food unappealing to the clientele.
In the restaurant industry, it is also not advisable to argue over which server has to take a table, when the party seated at said table is within earshot.
Adjust signs that read Windshield Wipers: $12.95 to Windshield Wiper: $12.95 as necessary.
Placate the old bat insisting you might be putting olive oil in her transmission for all she knows, by showing her it is, in fact, motor oil.
Telling a customer their vehicle requires a more expensive “special oil,” if they’ve ever had an oil change before in their life, will most likely be perceived as crap.
When a customer tells you “No cheese.” twice, it is generally indicative they do not want cheese, no matter how badly you would like to get rid of the cheese.
In the movie theatre industry, it is not considered best practice to have one employee selling tickets the evening Harry Potter opens.
When selling used video games, one should always put the game in the box before sending the customer home.
When selling me guitar accessories or strings, do not ask if they are “For my boyfriend.”
When selling preorders of a limited edition record printed on white vinyl, one should in fact eventually ship the order. One should also not infer one’s customers are being cranky when they inquire about their order three months after it should have been shipped.
seriously.
Wow, that’s quite a list. I can only identify with a few, and certainly hope that all of those haven’t happened to you!
Almost all in one weekend Nathan! (I was not the old bat, just sitting next to her)
Awesome list. I love posts like this.